In a world of instant communication, please note that to spot a con-person, consistency is key. What a person does over time, tells all.
In any social or professional setting, it can be useful to be able to spot whether someone is a giver or a taker.
Givers are those who enjoy helping others and are willing to give their time, resources, or expertise to benefit others.
A giver prioritizes the needs of others over their own, gives credit to others and acknowledges their contributions, is interested in building and maintaining relationships, shows gratitude and appreciation for what they have, reciprocates favors and helps others without expecting anything in return, respects others’ boundaries and preferences, and shows empathy and concern for others’ well-being.
Takers, on the other hand, are those who are more focused on their own needs and are less willing to help others unless they believe it will benefit them in some way.
A taker is someone who prioritizes their own needs over others, takes credit for others’ work and ideas, only reaches out to others when they need something, exhibits a sense of entitlement, is less likely to reciprocate favors or help others, uses guilt, manipulation, or pressure to get what they want, and shows less empathy and concern for others’ feelings and needs.
Here are some ways to spot givers and takers:
- Look for people who ask questions about others. Givers are often curious about others and want to know more about them, while takers may be more self-centered and focused on their own needs and interests.
- Observe how people treat others. Givers tend to be kind and helpful to everyone, while takers may be more selective about who they interact with and how they treat them.
- Look for signs of generosity. Givers are often more generous with their time, resources, and expertise than takers. They may offer to help others without expecting anything in return.
- Pay attention to how people respond to requests for help. Givers are often more willing to help others, while takers may be more hesitant or may only offer to help if they believe it will benefit them in some way.
- Watch for signs of reciprocity. Givers are often willing to give without expecting anything in return, while takers may be more likely to keep track of favors and may only be willing to help others if they believe it will benefit them in the future.
It’s important to keep in mind that people can exhibit both giver and taker behaviors depending on the situation, so look for patterns over time rather than making assumptions based on a single interaction.
Here are 7 signs that someone might be a taker:
- They tend to prioritize their own needs and interests over others. They may often interrupt others, dominate conversations, and steer discussions toward topics that interest them.
- They may have a tendency to take credit for other people’s work or ideas, without acknowledging or giving credit to those who helped them.
- They may only reach out to others when they need something, and may not show much interest in maintaining a relationship or connection beyond what they can get out of it.
- They may have a sense of entitlement and expect others to accommodate their needs and preferences, without considering the needs or preferences of others.
- They may be less likely to reciprocate favors or help others unless they believe it will benefit them in some way.
- They may be more likely to use guilt, manipulation, or pressure to get others to do what they want, rather than respecting others’ boundaries and preferences.
- They may show less empathy or concern for other’s feelings or needs, and may not take the time to listen to others or show interest in their lives and experiences.
It’s important to note that these behaviors can occur in different degrees and in different contexts and that people may exhibit both giver and taker behaviors at different times. Remember that people can change and grow over time, so it’s important not to make assumptions or judgments based on one’s past behavior.